Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Fact of the week

Fact of the week: One in ten people have more than two nipples...... =)) i cant stop laughing...... LMAO.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The rise of Assholism: The Religion - 2

Now, now....everyday tends to be worse than the previous. Guess His Highness King Murphy was right after all. Murphy Philosophy: "Smile... tomorrow will be worse".Back to bloggin now:

U guys ever heard of evolution?? yeah, the same theory that goes like: once upon a time, long long ago there was a single celled organism and man along with other forms of life on earth "evolved" from it.

No theory is perfect...2+2 maybe 4 on earth but it may not be the same in every corner of the cosmos [m not jokin people]. But then, man's quest is all about finding answers to the "existential mysteries" that have been bugging him for around 7 thousand years.....or at least getting as close to the answers as possible. Evolution is one of those theories that get us closer to the answer than ever. Who knows, it might jut get better?

Sadly though there are plenty of assholes around who believe tht evolution was not the way it happened. There are creationists who believe that a super natural being, whom they call "GOD", created the universe and life....GOD comes in different flavors, u can pick the one u like. Then there are cowards who have come up with "theory of intelligent design"....they say evolution might be the answer but it wouldn't work out if there wasn't a divine hand to facilitate it.....that is, god didn't allow monkeys (our ancestors) to have sex with camels or bears. Wondering what would happen if monkeys mated with bears? Well, we'd be having pubes all over our body. [ how cool can that be??]

This reminds me of SOUTHPARK, yeah the one which had Richard Dawkins. This is what Mrs.Garrison had to say to the class about evolution.

Mrs. Garrison:"Now I for one think that evolution is a bunch of bull crap. But I've been told I have to teach it anyway. It was thought up by Charles Darwin and it goes something like this:
In the beginning, we were all fish, okay, swimming around in the water. And then one day a couple of fish had a retard baby. And the retard baby was different so it got to live. So retard fish goes on to make more retard babies, and then one day a retard baby fish crawled out of the ocean with its mutant fish hands, and it had butt sex with a squirrel or something, and made this retard-frog-squirrel and then that had a retard baby which was a monkey-fish-frog, and then this monkey-fish-frog had butt sex with that monkey and that monkey had a mutant retard baby that screwed another monkey and that made you. So there you go. You're the retarded
offspring of five monkeys having butt sex with a fish-squirrel. Congratulations."

I am LMAO.......Boy, southpark kicks ass!

Some people can be so retarded that u just can't help but feel pity for them. I once remember reading somewhere about a die-hard catholic who believed that earth was 6000 years old. When asked about the fossils and other evidence all he said was that the almighty GOD deliberately planted the so-called evidence in the right place so tht humans would discover them and create an ass out of themselves. (how stupid!) This would also allow GOD to be selectively nice to the people who believed in "HIS" message (the holy texts).... others as always would have to burn in the eternal fires of hell.

How lame can people be sometimes..... fucking lusers.

Monday, January 21, 2008

RIAA hacked

Now, this is what u call good news, great news rather:
Recording Industry Association of America's (RIAA) website was hacked by some liberated souls.... kudos to them.

"A lack of security controls allowed hackers to 'wipe' the Recording Industry Association of America's (RIAA) website on Sunday." reported theregister.co.uk

Force be with us all....

Thursday, January 17, 2008

The Rise of Assholism: The Spoilt Bitches

First we have Paris Hilton getting Woman of the Year award and then the rumors of Britney Spears planing to get converted to Islam and settling in Pakistan.

I sometimes wonder, why are people so stupid? Are they pretending to be stupid? Or maybe they think being stupid is "cool".

Asshole Trivia: In Feb 2006, Paris was approached by an Indian director T.Rajeevnath to play the role of Mother Teresa.
Whao! How about granting sainthood for Osama. "Thou shall bombeth the Americans" - Osama, chap 6, verse 5)

I think the director has lost it......another victim of the incurable cranial-rectal inversion. Casting a bitch like Paris in the role of Mother Teresa? Damn! Hope the director realized that it was a serious movie about a great soul who did lot of selfless social work for the under-privileged and not a soft porn mallu movie.( Fans would love to see Paris co-starring Shakeela)

Now, commin to Britney. She better behave herself in Pakistan.
Few words for Britney: Watch out for the Fatwas,bitch.....n no wearing "MILF in the making" T-shirts, unless u want to get your boobs chopped off.

This brings us back to the quintessential question: Is the collective intelligence of lesser mortals good enough to decide the fate of the greater Humanity???
Answer: FUCK NO.

My Asshole theories are proven right again, for I am Darth Fartius, The Wise.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

We love Paris Hilton

Paris Hilton.....Man, who hasn't heard of her? Unless you live in Andromeda. Her name brings smiles on the face of millions of men out there(and you know why). She made happiness cum to their lives (NOTE:Spelling mistakes were intentional).

The Good news is that Harvard Lampoon Magazine has awarded "THE" Woman Of the Year to our beloved Paris. Can this get better? Yesss....How about a new tape to celebrate this event??


Additional reading:

Check out the Scott's post on his blog:

Paris Rulez....

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Fanatics Strike Back

I am back (btw,who he hell am i talkin to? Anyone there?!?!). Sleeping too much n watchin shit loads of movies is all i do these dayz. Yeah, m on vacation. Back to blogging:

Yesterday I was lookin for some Buddhist chants on youtube. I found what i wanted, the Heart Sutra. Its beautiful n sublime. The sanskrit pronunciations were not perfect though....but Imee Ooi's vocals n the music compensated for that 'n' times over. I am n always was a pan-theist. Getting attracted towards Buddhism never came as a surprise, coz as far as i know this religion does not have a "god". You will find beauty of Buddhism in the following lines:

No one saves us but ourselves,
No one can and no one may.
We ourselves must walk the path,
- The Dhammapada, 165.

I was looking at the comments on the youtube page, searching for more gyan. Then suddenly a guy pops up with this comment :
"Only the Truth of Jesus Christ is True!!! I tell you this not out of ignorance but of love. I want you all in Eternity with me in Jesus, and not in Eternal Separation from the Father. (hell)"

Aahhhh.....I started pulling my hair! It took me a while to re-gain my stability back. Hell, WTF! These fanatics r all over the place. The guy who wrote the comment pissed me off to the 'n'th degree. How can someone be so sure of something he/she has never seen.....ooohhh, gotcha, God works in mysterious ways, rite? ESAD assholes.

I was a hardcore believer once [i was studyin in 4th grade]. Might sound funny, but the only proof i had of god's existence those days was of babies gettin born. I wondered how the hell could tht happen, if not for the divine grace.....blah,the myth got busted when i came to know about sex.

The idea of a omniscient, omnipresent, omnipotent god never went well with me. As someone pointed out (was it Scott or dawkins? Scott i guess) god cannot be omniscient and omnipotent simultaneously. Lemme explain this for u people.....

For the benefit of people who did not write CAT/GRE :-D
1) omniscient = All knowing.
2) omnipotent = All powerful.....basically "God can kick anyones ass" philosophy.

Now, If God was omniscient then he'd be knowing everything (past,present n the future)......How could the benevolent god possibly listen to ur prayers n answer them? Coz he already knows whats gonna happen n he is just doin what he is supposed to do. If gods were so powerful tht he could change the future, then how the hell can he continue to be omniscient?? Get my point ?!?!

I have nothing against Jesus or Hindu or Muslim god.....Its just that their followers piss me off with their "My God n his words are the only truth n others r wrong". Dude, the guy following other religion has the same thing to say...... so who's right???

Heart Sutra (Sanskrit) by Imee Ooi

Thursday, January 10, 2008

The rise of Assholism: The Religion - 1

Aaahhhh.... here we are, facing the doom of our times. Hope is bleak....but its still there. I assume u guys must've been bombarded with conspiracy theories of different kinds.....about 9/11, doomsday cults, secret organizations n all tht shit. What I am goin to tell u ain't a bull-crap theory like the ones u know or what u've heard of. This one is real, fuckin real.

A lesbian is a person from the Middle East.
A pubic hair is a wild rabbit.
Genitals are people of non-Jewish origin.
Coitus is a musical instrument.

Now, that sounded funny rite? What would u say about a person who really believed in the above statements?
Would you call him/her ignorant? jackass? moronic retard? a fucktard?

Look around you. U'll find people comming in all varieties....but among them u will find the breed of religious fanatics, lunatics.These are the people who pose real threat to existence, both yours and mine. They have abandoned rational thinking and reasoning. Ignorance is bliss to them(literally though).

Have u heard of people who believe that the earth is 10000 years old? people who claim man never landed on the moon? How about this: Earth is carried on the shoulders of 4 elephants standing on top of a giant turtle which is in turn is supported by giant serpant. Sounds cool, huh? Well this was just a sample of religious idiotica.

Why is the greater part of humanity absconding from the reality? Can they not see the evidence? Does the truth hurt them so much that they still prefer to live by their prehistoric beliefs? They are happy to live inside their cosy bronze age cocoons. These cocoons have come to be known as "religion".

[To b continued........]